Note to Self

Do not put your keys in your mouth even in the 20-step walk between the house and garage when it is 14 below outside. They will freeze to your lips.

And do not try to pour hot coffee over them in order to loosen your skin's grasp on the keys. You will make a mess.

And no matter what you do, you will lose some of the skin off of your lips in order to get your keys back.

I hate Mondays.

3 comments:

Lance Ito said...

Ladies and Gentleman...may I present to you the highest class ranked Law Bitch and a member of Law Review. Great at law school...maybe a little lacking in common sense??? :) We all still love you Calculating. Didn't you see "A Christmas Story"? Don't lick metal in the cold.

Calculating Bitch said...

In my defense, when my hands are full in the morning, I always stick my keys in my mouth on my way to the garage -- so it was just a reflex.

Plus, I had NOT had any of the coffee yet, so I wasn't awake.

Sometimes I think I am still living in California. It's weeks like these that so cruelly remind me that I am not.

Lance Ito said...

You know what really sucks about the cold... People forget how to drive. Today it was snowing (one whole inch fell) during "drive time" and it took me over 1.5 hours to get to school (usually a 35 minute drive). Nothing beats walking into a 9:00 class at 9:45. Also around 1/4 of the class didn't even bother. Anita convinced me to come to class, over IM, since she had just walked in as well. I should have stayed in bed.