Butterflyfish apparently tagged the LawBitches to do this last Thursday. I think I noticed it, then promptly forgot. And since I am in a class that I wish I had a bottle of vodka in, I’ll answer these pressing questions.
PS to Mrs. Butterflyfish – don’t worry about OCI, none of us got jobs through OCI, and we all got jobs after our second year for the summer. Do not despair, some lawyer out there will want to hire you to make you their bitch, that’s a promise.
1. Name one person who made you laugh last night? Weiner King – He’s a 2L we’ve discussed before, and apparently the man has a spectacular sense of humor about our commentary about him. So while I’m not going to stop calling him Weiner King because it is a great name, he has definitely earned the honor of being a LawBitch-approved 2L.
2. What were you doing at 0800? Meeting with Calculating Bitch and Lance Ito to discuss a class. Also, whining about being there at 0800.
3. What were you doing 30 minutes ago? Trying to learn to how to sleep with my eyes open. No dice. Proceeded to wonder if the prof would notice if I started stabbing myself with a pencil to feel something, anything.
4. What happened to you in 2006? Got a job (after much searching), finished 1L year (hallelujah), was in a wedding (Christ almighty what an experience), and about the end of 2006, figured out I didn’t have to read for class.
5. What was the last thing you said out loud? “When do I get my whiskey?”
6. How many beverages did you have today? One extra large coffee thanks to Calculating who apparently wanted me to productive in our meeting this morning so she bought me one. Then a diet coke. And what I wouldn’t do for a vodka-soda right now….there’s very little I wouldn’t do.
7. What color is your hairbrush? I have many hairbrushes because I am vain.
8. What was the last thing you paid for? Wine. What?
9. Where were you last night? “Role-playing” with Swinging Kennedy, and not the exciting kind of role-playing dammit.
10. What color is your front door? WTF kind of question is that? I dunno, white? If I could I’d paint “go away” on it if that is a better answer.
11. Where do you keep your change? There’s a ton in the bottom of my school bag, because I just throw it anywhere. I hate carrying change.
12. What’s the weather like today? Sunny! (I should be on a bar patio right now)
13. What’s the best ice-cream flavor? Mint chocolate chip, and I’m only answering so I don’t overuse “WTF kind of question is that?”
14. What excites you? Graduation!
15. Do you want to cut your hair? No, I have a roundish head, if I cut it I’d fear I would look like an Oompa Loompa. (minus the orange skin, tanning is gross)
16. Are you over the age of 25? Nope.
17. Do you talk a lot? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
18. Do you watch the O.C.? Well, this show has been off the air for like 2 years or something, so this is also a stupid question.
19. Do you know anyone named Steven? I had an ex named Steve, is that close enough?
20. Do you make up your own words? Yes, but generally I am more likely to screw up phrases i.e. “close but no tomato”
21. Are you a jealous person? No. I am awesome.
22. Name a friend whose name starts with the letter: Ashley (I love names that are so common they can still be anonymous)
23. Name a friend whose name starts with the letter: K-Fed (we’re not friends, but he and I could have a total bitch-fest about Brit-Brit.)
24. Who’s the first person on your received call list? Sandra Gay. I think. Maybe. I never check my phone.
25. What does the last text message you received say? “What up ho-bag” from my sister. So you see, the snarkiness is apparently genetic.
26. Do you chew on your straw? No, chewing on the straw makes the opening narrower, therefore takes longer to drink the alcohol.
27. Do you have curly hair? Yes, but few know that, it gets straight really easy. As I said, awesome.
28. Where’s the next place you’re going to? Home. “Bones” has the lead character in a Wonder Woman costume the whole time, and y’all know I need to see that.
29. Who’s the rudest person in your life? No one rude really. Annoying? Well, that’s too many to go through. My husband’s family make up like ¾ of that.
30. What was the last thing you ate? Awesome free lunch provided by a large firm. That’s really all they’re good for.
31. Will you get married in the future? Depends on if my husband continues to refuse to get me a puppy. Then maybe.
32. What’s the best movie you’ve seen in the past 2 weeks? “Michael Clayton” – totally a law nerd movie but a spectacular movie too. I’m convinced the corporate counsel woman in that movie is Calculating.
33. Is there anyone you like right now? Good God these questions are boring me.
34. When was the last time you did the dishes? Seriously? This is the best kind of questions the authors could come up with?
35. Are you currently depressed? ……….sigh……..this questionnaire is depressing me because it’s making it hard for me to be entertained and so I am actually considering listening to the current discussion in class. I mean really.
36. Did you cry today? No, but I did do the stomp the foot and pout when someone compared me to Lucy from Charlie Brown, as if it was a bad thing.
37. Why did you answer and post this? 1) We were “tagged” 2) I was bored
38. Tag 5 people who would do this survey: Yeah. right.