When We Grow Up

Ah, its time for yet another “Get to Know Us” here at There’s No Competition. The question posed to each of the bloggers was based on the ever popular question that inevitably is voiced by extended family or friends of family at every graduation, wedding or family reunion: what do you want to be when you grow up? The crew here responded to the question at 3 different points in their lives: when they were a little kid, when they were graduating from high school and currently.

Anita
Little Kid: Dolphin trainer
After High School: Doctor
Now: Anything that pays me enough to pay off my debt

Calculating Bitch
Little Kid: First female President of the United States
After High School: Journalist
Now: Tax and Estate Planning Attorney (but if that doesn't work out, I'll be Sandra Gay's Pimp)

Class Bitch
Little Kid: When I was in kindergarten I wanted to be a vet this was until I was 10. Then I decided that I wanted to be a lawyer and if that didnt work a doctor.
After High School: Family Law Attorney or International Business Attorney
Now: I just want one job and not three. I want a job that I go to and have at least one day a week off from. Something that I dont have to run out every summer and compete with highschool students for a lame ass job because I have my summers off. Oh yeah and something that pays enough to cover the loans, that would be good. Prostitute maybe?

John Roberts
Little Kid: Architect/engineer
After High School: computer programmer
Now: male stripper

Lance Ito
Little Kid: When I was little I wanted to be an Dr. (MD).
After High School: After finishing high school I still wanted to be a Dr. (MD).
Now: Plans have been severely altered. Now when I am done with law school, I hope to land a job at a big time IP law firm and work there for a minimum of 5-7 years (hopefully make partner) and if I don't make partner "settle" for work as an in house IP lawyer for either a Biotech company or a really good research university.

Larceny Bitch
Little Kid: Lawyer
After High School: Lawyer
Now: Trial Lawyer (See, now aren't I just annoying even more now?)

Reasonable Peep
Little Kid: When I was little, in fifth grade, for graduation, we were each asked what we wanted to be when we grow up and it was put into our yearbook. I said I wanted to be an attorney or an actress. I really wanted to be an actress more at the time, but I really loved watching LA Law with my folks and we had just done mock trial for our class.
After High School: I had always thought I would die young because I did not envision myself doing anything after high school. All I knew was you go to college, but then what? When I started college, I was interested in both medicine and law. I was pre-law with a communications emphasis when I entered college, but that changed after a semester...
Now: I just want to be happy.

Sandra Gay
Little Kid: Stripper

After High School:
Stripper
Now: Stripper and Rapper (life ain't nothing but bitches and money!)

Scalito
Little Kid: Evel Kenievel.
After High School: A professional surfer on the North Shore of Oahu.
Now: Mailroom worker like Michael J. Fox in The Secret of My Succe$s.

6 comments:

dicta said...

hey calculating...i like tax and estate planning too. we are sick, sick people (or so i hear). i think it'd be nice having some of your clients be dead.

Calculating Bitch said...

Dicta - nice to know that someone out there is as sick and twisted as I am. I agree, having dead clients will be much easier to work with. I thought about going to school here instead of law school, but I don't think I'd actually want to touch dead bodies. I'd rather just deal with their money after they are dead.

Anyway, I think we've chosen a good career path -- there are only two things certain in life: death and taxes, so we'll always have a client base.

Legally Brunette said...

I want a job that I go to and have at least one day a week off from. Something that I dont have to run out every summer and compete with highschool students for a lame ass job because I have my summers off. Oh yeah and something that pays enough to cover the loans, that would be good. Prostitute maybe?

*snort* I feel your pain. When I finished my bachelor's degree, I had high hopes of changing the world and really enjoying what I do. 8 years later, my needs have changed.... now I'd just like to not be working 7 days a week, have some paid time off, and decent health insurance.

My, how times have changed.

dicta said...

hmmm, if i wasnt already 2/3 done

The BLS said...

And here I thought I was the only one who wanted to be like Michael J. Fox in Secret of My Success...

Christian said...

Hmmm... do I make the crass Michael J. Fox comment, the easy but sure prostitute joke... I'll go with the...

At the PDs office a bunch of the plaintiffs are dead. Hmmm. Homicides and mornings with the medical examiner. I need a breakfast burrito.