Now not only am I cool, but I drive a cool car

So this past Monday, Larceny Bitch got a new car. (The old car was no longer happy with me and started smelling and acting funny). I've been driving it for 3 days, and it's already saved my life like 4 times, (Great brakes on the little thing.) Why do people not pay attention to stop signs? Are they just a suggestion? (My annoyance with the loss of use of turning signals can be another discussion later).

Yesterday, I was tooling around in my little hot rod, and was coming down a road that is known as a busy road. There are no stop signs, but all the crossroads do have stop signs (for obvious reasons.) Well, as I'm driving down this road, I see a woman coming up to a stop sign on one of the cross roads. Does she stop? Of course not. She kinda pauses, then looks (sees me and the guy next to me coming down on her) and then proceeds to go anyway. Why would you just roll right through it and cause me and the guy next to me to have to slam on our brakes? As she sees me and this guy slam on our brakes she then decides to STOP in the middle of the intersection. So we can see already that this woman is not only a great driver, but brilliant as well. My car stops maybe 5 feet before I would have broadsided her. She then proceeds to hit the gas and keep going (without looking at me or the guy next to me.) At least have a regretful look on your face lady. I just lost half my new brake pads on that one!

But anyway, me and little G made it through. I then had to pull into a law firm parking lot (where I now work) where about half of the attorneys are personal injury attorneys and said to myself "Look Larceny, if you're going to get in a car accident today or are going to hit something, DO NOT, I repeat DO NOT hit a car in this parking lot." I would have been screwed. I think PI attorneys should have bumper stickers on them that say "Beware: Personal Injury Lawyer" - Everyone would keep a nice distance from them, they'd never be bothered by other drivers. Hmmmm....maybe I should be one, then if that lady had hit me, she would have been in for a world of hurt.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Do you use your new little car to chase ambulances for your new job at the personal injury firm?

Larceny Bitch said...

Not yet! Give me a few days and maybe, I'll do a lot of things to get paid. (Although the lawyer I work for doesn't do that type, the other lawyers don't seem to have a problem giving me things to do too)