When I Grow Up, I Wanna Be

Reasons I Should Become a Tax and Estate Attorney
  • There are only two things certain in life: death and taxes. So at least I'll always have a job.
  • According to a footnote in my Property book: "Estate attorneys will likely generate more than $25 billion in revenue from servicing estates in the $1 million or more range during the 1996-2005 period. This figure is greater than the net income generated by all partnerships for all services in 1994." I'll get a piece of that pie.
Reasons I Should NOT Become a Tax and Estate Attorney
  • My friends make fun of me for being a nerd.
    • Then again, I'm already a nerd regardless of the future job choice.
  • Tax Attorneys are known alcoholics. In the words of Alton Brown: "Except for tax attorneys nothing sits so nicely on the side of a martini glass as does a shrimp."
    • Then again, becoming an alcoholic after law school would just mean that I'd have to start drinking less.
  • People at cocktail parties give me strange looks when I tell them what I want to do.
    • Then again, the same people ask me if they can give me a call once I graduate.
  • My friends make fun of me for being a nerd.
  • All of my relatives will want me to a) do their taxes and b) write their wills.
    • Then again, I can just write myself in as a beneficiary.
  • Did I mention that my friends make fun of me for being a nerd?


Scalito said...


Larceny Bitch said...

Nerd. Also, you did not cite that quote, you already failed.

The BLS said...

Umm... I think by nature, the majority of law students ARE, in fact, nerds.

Calculating Bitch said...

Thanks, BLS.

As the old saying goes: "Takes one to know one."

Or maybe it's "People in glass houses shouldn't throw stones."

Anyway, Scalito and Larcey, I think you two convicted yourselves.